questions/ memories

These 2 deals I got going on here are from a freinds blog, I figure I would post just for fun.

One word. That's all you can write as your answer. Can you do it? Not as easy as you might think. Change the answers to fit you and post! It's hard to only use one word answers!

1. Where is your cell phone? ....................Charging
2. Your significant other?....................... None
3. Your hair?....................................Short
4. Your mother? .................................Short
5. Your father?.................................. Bald
6. Your favorite thing?.......................... socializing
7. Your dream last night?........................none
8. Your favorite drink..........................pina colada

9. your dream/goal..........success

10. The room you're in?.......................... mine
11. Your ex?..................................... married
12. Your fear?................................... failure
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years........... succesfull
14. Where were you last night?................... home
15. What you're not?............................. happy
16. Muffins...................................... fat
17. One of your wish list items?................. healthier
18. Where you grew up?........................... lava
20. What are you wearing?........................ clothes
21. Your TV?..................................... none
22. Your pets?................................... outside!
23. Your computer? .............................. light
24. Your life?................................... confusing
25. Your mood?................................... grouchy
26. Missing someone?............................. always
27. Your car?.................................... camry
28. Something you're not wearing?................watch
29. Favorite Store?.............................. macy's
30. Your summer?................................. shot!
31. Like someone?................................ always
32. Your favorite color?......................... green
33. Last time you laughed........................ today
34. Last time you cried?......................... saturday

As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember! Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty cool (and funny) to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you

Shake ya tail featha's

Wow, today was kinda crazy! Its so weird, it is midnight and I am not one bit tired. That is just not my style, the reason is because we went to work but no sales so no installs, so therefore it was a waste of time but worth the effort because you never know what will come of it. Today we went to the Polynesian Cultural Center (PCC) and seen the canoe parade, Hawai'i village, ate at the luau, and watched a sweet performance by dancers from each village represented at PCC.
We got annual passes, so we will be going back for sure to see all of the other villages. Each village/island does a show of how their culture works and different things that they do. I have to say I like the best, from what I got to see, was during the canoe parade, the girls from Fiji.... they do all the hip shaking, and most of you know that is my big cup of tea!!! Along with belly dancing of course. LMAO! It was a really neat expereince to be a part of for sure, I have to admit that seeing all them hotties shaking their hips was fun, but seeing fit guys who work out just gave me more motivation to get in shape, I hate knowing how I look, and so seeing people who are in shape helps out allot. This is exciting too, this semester I can get back to a workout routine with people who like to work out alot, because they help motivate me to keep on track. Last semester was so bad, I could only work out with one girl who didn't have to try hard to loose weight so it made it frustrating at times to keep going.
I just thought about something that I am sad to miss, yes, I am going to end up missing the festival in Ft. Hall, darn, its one of my favorite things to do too. I really do think that ancient times natives from the main land and Hawaiians were some how connected, allot of the dances and movements and traditional styles reflect allot of the same-- I have noticed. The Shoshone festival is the first week of August, I think everyone that lives in S E Idaho should really go watch it. Its part of our culture so why not learn and know about it?
If you have never seen dancing native style then your crazy, they do it in grade schools to help teach history, but I do know one thing that many people have not seen is Indian Relay Races, where the stakes are high and so is the purse. It is so fun to watch and I am so shocked everytime I talk to someone who has lived and grew up in the area, and come to find out that they have never seen it or really know what it is. So go to the link above and watch my video of lasts years race, I think it was just a Tuesday race, and I will be there to all races during the EISF, so if you wanna watch some relays, call me and you can go with me.
I didn't even read through this blog so if it is really blotchy and random, deal with it.
Ciao

I seen a photo of myself! YIKES!!!

Darn, I have been doing good on the whole diet thing, I have not been eating a ton at a time. I wish I wish I could say that I have been eating healthy but that is not the case, sadly enough, I probably eat McDonald's more than I ever have in my life. Its so convenient, and who wants to cook in this nasty apartment that no one can clean up after themselves... Its so gross!! I did buy some fruit and veggies to eat, but once they were gone I decided they cost way to much right now and made me max my budget, so I go unhealthy and cheap! Although I am chowing down a can of Slimfast right now, it actually tastes good and fills me up!
Last night we went to the Hardrock cafe in Honolulu, it was very loud and they do some new salsa thing where salsa dancers come in and do competition or just dance, but everyone was all dressed up really nice. They did not start to come in until 10:00'ish pm, the music was pretty loud, but all in all it was good. I could not hear a word anyone was saying, since they had screens with pro dancers dancing, I enjoyed watching that. Oh yea, I ordered me a big fat salad, I do love myself some romain lettuce, so crispy and full of good stuff (fiber), on the side had 2 slices of garlic toast too. ok, well one kid who went showed me a photo he took with me in it, I did not like what I seen. I know its not what I want other people to see, so that just gave more incentive to keep on track. Like I said before, 10 pounds before school starts. That is more health reason than cosmetics, but eventually the cosmetic reason will be in the mix after 15 pounds, oh yea! WOOT! WOOT!
Ciao

Can't Sleep

Breaking the camels back!!!

To forewarn you, this blog is nothing fun nor friendly to read, it is full of sad time for me and its kind of my vent right now! Sad to say, but it is really hard to talk over the phone during this time when I could be setting with family right now.

Last Friday I got a call about Grandma, they found cancer that had spread inside of her, that's allot for someone in her condition, that is the reason they can not control her blood sugar levels.
We have had spouts of diabetic coma before, I do thank God that every time we ran into the problem that we was able to revive her. Tonight Shell called me and woke me up, so when she told me stuff it didn't really hit me, in the next few minutes I woke up and digested what she had told me... once it registered the emotions flowed!
All I know is that grandma is in coma right now, the family opted to let her go this time, this is a hard decision but I know its the best for her. It is time for her to go be with her family and Grandpa, she missed him so much. I just think how happy they will all be to reunite on the other side of the veil when they meet up again.
For me, this brings up lots of different emotions that I have had to deal with and try to put away during my time of caring for her, it really brings allot of things up that I wish would not come to mind, but yet, I feel as though there are things I feel so guilty about, one is something I think about allot. Was it the right choice to come out to Hawaii again??? Why I ask this is because 5 years ago when I stepped down and walked away from promotions in Utah to move back home, I had no real reason why I had done that. I now know why! But at that time I just couldn't answer why, when people would ask me about it. I know the reason being is that it gave me time with Grandpa, we would go visit Grandma and Grandpa everyday! So many cool things we did and learned about them that we never knew before. We would help them with little things, and they loved company from the grandkids so much!!! I am so thankful for that time! I still to this day remember so vividly so many things and the happiness on their faces when we would do things with them. That last time I seen grandpa he was laying in the hospital bed after getting very sick, all the family was there to visit him, and when we were leaving I remember telling him to get better and hurry up on it because we needed to take the horses up in the hills for a ride, but my 2 little cousins gave him hugs before leaving and for some reason that stuck out in my mind so much.... I actually regret not doing the same thing. The next time I seen him was after he had got home and passed away, I actually was the first one over there and fixed his body so it was not so crooked on the bed. I just wish I could of said goodbye to him, I know he knows my feelings and all, but I still have so much guilt from not giving him a hug,

Grandma really needed someone to just be there with her, she did not admit that but we all knew she hated to be alone and liked people to just be in the house, even if it was watching TV while she did her house work, it brought her so much joy. So we kind of just ended up living there to help her take care of the place, give her company, and just be there for anything. As time went on, we had to do allot of care giving for her, in the four years we lived with Grandma we had to deal with allot of stress and things we did not quite understand. Mainly the mental diseases she had, it was so strange because it was slowly coming on and the things we dealt with were so small and subtle. At times I did regret dealing with it, but I would always feel guilty for thinking that. Shell and I would talk when down and say things we didn't mean just out of frustration, yet we now can look back and see so much we could of done differently, as a matter of fact I feel very guilty for avoiding Grandma at times just because I could not deal with the things that were going on. It was not the Grandma I knew, it was someone else do to dementia, yet we did not know that, we could not understand why she would change so often, mentally.
It is a like caring for a child, they can be annoying if your around them and you need that break from them, yet if you leave they are helpless to a point. Sure they can find something to feed themselves, use the bathroom. But you know that you just cant let them be alone for too long. After 4 years of taking care of her, I have really weird emotions going on, this is a person that had taken so much time and effort, did ANYTHING possible to care for us, her grandkids, they would sacrifice so much for us, I some what feel good that I sacrificed 4 years of my life to help her, but now when I do look back I feel so much guilt because I think I could of done more, I did not put my whole hearted effort into it because I got caught up in my own selfishness. Why couldn't I do more then what I did? I know I cant sop her illnesses, but I know I could of been more understanding.. I just cant type it in words what I'm meaning.
This entire situation makes it hard to be this far away and not be able to say goodbye, give her one last hug, or just be there with her. I did go see her before I flew out, but she was asleep, I did talk to her for a minute, of course she did not respond, me and mom put some pictures in her room to make it feel more homey earlier that day. But its good to know that others say when they went to see her she was happy and very talkative. I do miss her company, it makes it hard because I grew so accustom to caring for someone and always looking after so many aspects of their lives, before going to bed checking on her every night, even assisting her in the middle of the night when she just couldn't help herself. When I think back on the last few months she was home, we were very blessed that the slightest noises woke us up to go help her out. One night I had the TV on and I fell asleep on the floor, but I awoke for some reason, then I got up to use the bathroom and just had the feeling to go check on her, I don't understand how it happened but that was the night she was in coma and we couldn't get her awake, it took EMS a long time to get her sugar back up. So this is the same thing that we are doing now, except they are going to let her go naturally, I heard that the last time they checked her vitals earlier yesterday, her blood was at 11. That is lethal number, you should always be 100 and up.
It makes me feel good to know that in that state she is in, she is not feeling pain, I honestly believe when God plans on use crossing over, that he takes it all way, so in my mind she is in a pain free state, which she may be spiritually already crossed over and her body is still functioning. God works in mysterious ways, I don't ever doubt those things, my sadness really comes from knowing I wont see her for a very long time, and its a build up of emotions with all the things that has gone on, guilt of not doing what I think I should had to show Grandma and Grandpa how much I loved them.

Just the saying goodbye for the last time is so hard to know that I could of just done that but I did not. I am not a hugger, I am not a person who likes to touch, but I really regret not giving just one last hug to those people that I hold so close to me. I know people think its just grandparents, but to me these were people who were another set of parents!

As I reread this, I guess this is my way of starting the mourning process, Grandma is not passed away, but I know I will get a call soon, and it is very sad to know that I will not be in the solace of my family, I really wish I was with them now, it is a comforting feeling to be able to be there with everyone to comfort each other, even a few shoulders to cry on, shoot, you don't feel so weird balling when everyone else is doing it. :) I know we all know that it will be happy day when she goes over and is met by her siblings and Grandpa.

This blog gives my emotions not justice, there is not way I could ever really put how it all works for me, I have had such a complex past few years, very few people really know the trials I have had to deal with and how I felt and feel now. So don't think this is everything, there is much explanation that would have to go on for you to really understand this blog. I know it seems confusing and just out of whack, that's because it is.
I guess I call someone to talk to, I really hate this, being alone out here and having no one to go talk to, the time difference makes it really hard too. It's 2:00am now, I got the call at 11pm, I am tired but can not sleep, I don't want to miss the call and chance to talk with family.

Chris equals Crazy

View of Kaneohe (both photos)

Today we headed to the Pali Lookout up the Pali Highway to the middle of the Island, The Nuuanu Pali Lookout ("Cool Height Cliff")overlooking the 985 foot cliffs of the Koolau Mountain Range. It was here in 1795 that King Kamehameha and his warriors defeated the O'ahu armies by sending them over these steep, forested cliffs and claiming his victory and uniting the Hawaiian Islands. The breathtaking sight and the gruesome history of the battle fought here is enough to cause a chill to run up your spine.
So I got some pics of myself and I do not like what I see, so I decided I need to get back on the train and be very stern with myself and my eating habits. I swear when I am out here I go crazy and eat all the time and eat lots of bad foods. So I vow to loose 10 pounds before school starts and I leave Hawaii!!! It will be done, if I say it, it means I will do it! I really need to get ahold of Dorese and figure out what the heck she done when she lost 12 pounds in a week, she was attempting the southbeach diet. If you read her blog, you will see how the 4th of July kicked her can.. LOL. Well, I am sure by now she is back on the train. I forgot my notebook that I log all my food in and times when I eat, because when I do that I see what I ate and how long it has been. So if I keep up an eating schedule where I can eat every 2 hours then I do drop pounds better and it is healthier because your only eatin small stuff. It is hard to eat good here because good food is so expensive.... so is bad food, but you can get more bad for better deals then the good food.
So Heidi got me hooked up with Costco's application process, I dont know if it will go far. I have the right credentials for the job but I dont have the right availbility for the business. School has me in class every night of the week except weekends of course. So in the grocery/bulk retail business that is a big red flag to them, because majority of business is done during the hours after 4:00pm. So pray for me that I can get something figured out, everything for school is going to put me in the nasty red zone!!! Me and Millie was talking about the red zone, how we both hate to be there, neither of us have worked since Feb. Savings are lasting a long time to make it to this point, but the plan was to make enough money to not have to worry about working lots of hours to live while school is in session. That was and still is the plan for me if I can get all my ducks in order and my poop on a scoop!

Sharks Cove

So here is a great video that I have been watching a lot in the recent weeks, it is a tribute to the military. It is an awesome video and pipe band!!!! I want this song played at my funeral when it comes!


Ciao!

Say My Name!

Its so late right now and I tried to sleep but just can't do it! I actually slept in until 10:00 this morning. I think it was because I had a lot of sugar recently and that crap makes me so tired!
I feel like blogging but have nothing fun or exciting to blog about, but I do have some crazy stories to tell. LOL
So I am in an appartment with kids who have never been away from thier parents, I am sure the longest was a week for some sort of church camp. So now they have all this freedom they have never had before. They do not know how to react to it, theres even a 16 year old who has never had a job, I wont even get into the stuff that kid needs to learn. I personally would of never had him come out unless his mommy was here with him. It is very evident that he has never had to take much responsibility in his life for much in his life and the apron strings are very attached as well.
So two of the guys like to do outlandish things that entertain themselves, one night they snuck into the pool after hours and went skinny dipping together and then got caught but was able to run from the property security. Everyday when they are suppose to be working they find each other to go get food, even if it means walking up to 3 miles. So last night they had purchased some Veet, I think that is what it is, and decided that they heard that it feels good to remove hair in certain areas, so they did it, Yup! They went back to pre-puberty days. That was pretty funny to come home and have them brag and be so proud of themselves for what they did. Now, a day later, they keep complaining of the itch it has caused. Last night they kept running around naked checking each others work out and discussing their anatomy, I do wonder about them some days, but I try to just pass it off as curiosity.
So while running around in their birth day suits they decided to take pics with a guitar to post on facebook. Just to clarify, they were not trying to take rated X photographs, they were trying to be artistic and pose with the guitar, I do admit they got some funny pictures out of the deal. Over all it was funny, yet still awkward because it was just them two and they do some pretty strange things together, even when others are around. The one guy everyone just expects craziness to come from him!!!
Being in Hawaii is good, I do think that it is hard for me because I have to put a lot of effort in making sure that I control my attitude and not be pushy or step on anyones toes. I like to take control and have A LOT of control in certain situations, I can be very assertive and aggressive also, I do miss being able to manage people now, I guess managing at Wal Mart gave me that and gave me a good deal of accomplishment because I could manage the business end along with the people end. But from being out here I can see all my little quirks that I just want to say or do something about but I know I shouldn't because its not my place nor do I feel confident that its the right thing for the particular situation I am in. I am not here to manage anyone or to take control, I am here for the learning experience. But I still want to just take control because I just see so much I would love to take control, for some reason I love to be in control. But to boast about myself I know I can make things happen and I can talk to someone to get what I want but it always benefits the business also, I had a kick ass track record at Wal Mart, every one of my departments were making big increases and not only in sales but bottom line profits, WOOT WOOT. I know Aimee is going to read this and go on about how I am such a control freak! She got to hear all about how I was so mean, especially to that nasty lazy girl I wanted to fire one time soooo bad, but could not because bad managers. She could not sweet talk me, I am all about bustin some balls and getting work done, she and many many others are about just being there and trying to make best life long friends. Really, where the heck is this blog going? I don't even know, it is so out of control, I know I need to think about things before I type them.
Auf Wiedersehen
That so reminds me of one my YouTube channels I watch, AricWinter, you should go check him out, he does vlogs in English and Duetch!

T-O-O-T! T-O-O-T!

Today is the end of a crappy day!
It was just not so hot, well ok it was hot. Just allot of work going on and stuff going on.
Today is my Birthday! just saying the reminds me of when we were little and Grandpa would video tape us on our birthday and make us say the same line, we all had to do it. Those were good times that are far in the past now.
So a few days ago I got asked what kind of cake I like, I wasn't even realizing why I was getting asked until Brent's kids started talking about birthdays. But I told Jenn I love Texas sheetcake with homemade frosting. So I wasn't thinking she would really do it, I mean come on, were only out here for a little while why go buy everything you need to make a cake out of scratch? Well that is my personal thoughts, low and behold, they went and got the stuff and made me a cake for tonight! How cool is that? It was so great, I loved the frosting especially, it was extra sugary and kinda grainy, I loved it! I could of ate the entire cake myself but I didn't because I know I don't need that stuff and I was being nice.
It was good times, I got stuff to make pina coladas, I plan on making them tomorrow since I was not able to do so tonight. That is all I have to say, this is a really sucky blog so far, I have not really opened up. You people who know me and have kept up with my blogs know this is a crazy boring blog for me. My mind is not really functioning correctly for me this summer. Once school is in session I will get back to myself. I think I am mentally exhausted all the time that I don't think about stupid stuff.
Ciao!

Finally, I feel at ease!!

Yea, so how do I start this one off? Well to start I am back in Hawaii again. I do love it here, its just so different, at one point I thought I could live here for longer, but as time has went on I know this is not my kinda my style of living. The traffic is so bad here and to be frank, the Asians drive me crazy some times!
Here is some cool news, as the night before my flight I was nervious to say the least, but I just could not shake the feeling.... So I didn't get much sleep that night, then I flew the rest of the day, yeah you set when your flying but it sure is tiresome. So I talked to Brent while waiting in Seattle. I have to admit he can calm me down and make me feel better if he is confident in what ever the case is. Well I talked to him for a while and felt excited about this entire thing. So I get here to Hawaii, it was pretty cool to fly over the island when it was dark! I hope to fly out when it is dark too because then it will be a quick flight, you ask why? Because I will sleep most of it!!! So back to my story, my freaking ADHD is getting me distracted. ok, so I get back to the story, well I get here and hear about all the drama that has been happening, I get took to the apartment and just feel uncomfortable so I slept the night at Brents, there was not such a good feeling in the air. I was so tired too! i slept so good that night at their place!!! Well, the next day some "meetings" were happening and some business got taken care of! So I come back to the old apartment and end up with my own freaking room, how sweet is that? many of you know that I get cranky when trying to sleep if I cant relax, and well there was no way I was going to relax with certain people around. Now their gone and it just feels so nice how the whole situation is working out. I do have to say that the room is a mess, I swear so much junk was on the floor, but I think I can manage to clean this up how I like it!!!
On a even happier note, I feel great, I think I am resettling pretty quick and feel good about what is going on. Plus, I like everyone around and no one has anything negative to say, so that helps allot!
Ciao!

Flights, no sleep, and too many hours alone!

So, I was very nervous the other day about this last trip I am taking, I really couldn't
shake a feeling of nervousness and discomfort. I had never felt like that before about flying, so I am setting here in the Seattle airport waiting my 6 hours before my final flight leaves, this is really boring and quite honestly, I am lonely, I usually don't get that way when I am traveling but I am today. I keep talking to random people that will sit down by me. The flight from Boise to Seattle I sat by a lovely lady who was fun to talk too, she is a pharmaceutical salesman that flies all over Montana, Wyoming, Idaho and Utah. she was very friendly and fun to talk too. So, I am setting in front of the big windows in the central terminal and it is so busy here. They have huge wall of windows you can set in front of and watch planes take off and land. I found where my departure terminal is at, and I have to take a train over to it because it is a stinking separate entity its almost as bad as LAX. I have to say that LAX only had "pay-for only"
internet. At least here I can get online and mess around. I am hoping that if I stay awake here that I will sleep the entire flight to the rock.
This blog is out of total boredom! I have nothing in my head because I have not gotten much sleep and I an only think about if this was the right choice. I sure do double think my own decisions allot! Oh well, its part of my life so I better figure out how to get used to dealing with it.
so there is a asain family setting next to me, and the little girl is singing little kid songs, it is cute an kinda funny! she keeps checking out macbook, her parents don't seem like they are in mood to socialize so I will not try..
I guess for now I shall power down and save some battery for when I want to get online again.

Thinking! Pondering! Blogging!

Today has been a day that I have been thinking allot. After coming home and getting asked to go back out I took them up on it, I had a ticket for the 4th of July to fly back to Hawaii. After a few messages I lost confidence in the ability to get home or even go anywhere for the 4th's festivities. I also really don't like the feeling of setting alone on a holiday which is one where you traditionally enjoy it with family and friends doing fun things and capping off your day watching fireworks. So I had decided that I don't want to experience that empty lonely feeling again so I called the airline to change my ticket to a different date. I thank God that it really worked and it did not cost me an arm and a leg. Well, I also thought that if they have only 2 vehicles in Hawaii and I land at 8:16pm, that doesn't give them much time to go do anything fun or enjoy their night while trying to accommodate me. I think it worked out much better for me and everyone else.
I did enjoy the 4th, I do wish I got a ticket for Saturday or Sunday, because now I have to wait an extra 5 days before getting out to Hawaii.
I do miss Hawaii, I really do miss going to the temple ground there. The temple in Laie is beautiful, but the grounds are so nice, very large, and just a nice place to go to spend time alone and really think and study your scriptures while enjoying the beauty around you. I have not yet been inside of the temple, but just being there makes me feel better. I really have been struggling with allot of things and just by going up there would just make me feel as though everything I have been doing was ok, that I had made the right choices for me.


Photo of the temple in Laie.













(Below)Check out this view from the temple over looking the grounds and you can sorta see the visitors center (left hand side), this is where they hold allot of events and show many different movies. Brent, Kevin and myself watched a Asian movie in there about their culture and how it is close to Christianity. The theater we were in had a waterfall and small creek running in front of the screen, it was so neat, it was cool and just so relaxing to just be in there.




So having so much time, I keep double thinking everything I am doing and wanting to do. I feel like I am not making the right decision, but I do not want to go back a hourly job. I need to go make the most of my summer by being productive and taking a step out of my comfort zone, I know this will be great for me and be good for the future. I think that we are put into situations for a reason, I think this reason for me is because it is preparing me for what I have to deal with in the future. As a matter of fact, I had been feeling really bad, just not happy or feeling exited about anything, I miss certain people and talking to certain people that always make me feel good when talking to them. Like I said before I had been thinking allot about what I am doing, but logical thinking tells me that I need to keep on with this regardless of how I feel. So last night I was reading the scriptures and then started to read an article in the July 2008 Ensign, "Waiting a little season", p.32, The story is going on about a girl who was steadfast in her life and always living the best she could in righteousness, she was not married and was not close to being married and said she did not question it but prayed one night for understanding. Then she says she was reading in the DC, and come across the story about Zions Camp and how they were protected as they marched, but as they come to their destination they were commanded to disassemble. She said she applied this her situation and this is what she said:

The Lord is not disregarding the miles I've traveled with His army but is purposefully building on those effort so that I can be a stronger defender in His kingdom. As I strive to be faithful, humble, and patient, I will know more perfectly my duty and the things He requires at my hands.

This story really hit me, I think that I have been doubting allot of my own decisions and things that I have done, when truly, I think I have been guided to do what I have done and accomplished the things that I have accomplished thus far in my life. I think so far I have learned a great deal in being humble, but I also think that due to my own abuse of agency that I may not be where I really want to be in life. I do know that through the power of repentance and the mercy of God that I can be where I want to be and where he wants me to be to be able to be the best that I can be.
I have to disclaim that repentance is such a personal thing and I know many religious people think that you have had to done something very very bad to repent, but I think that even when we feel proud, or think unhealthy things about others that we need to take the time and ask for forgiveness of those people we have wronged and God that he may help us be better and give us the strength to not do it again.
So, reading my Blessing, it does not give me any sort of specific insight as to what I do in my life and just lets me choose a career that I like. I often think about this, I think about my own attributes and what I know and what I like... what and where can I go with these things? I think I am shy, but people tell me that I am easy to talk to and I am a people person, yet after being around allot of people I feel tired and so exhausted. I know I have skills to manage people and enjoy the challenge of making a business work and finances work out also. I just ask myself allot, "Where do I go and what do I do?" I've yet to find something I can see myself doing for along time. I think this summer will open my eyes to a new world that I knew was there but never payed any attention too.
Well, I guess this is enough analyzing going on here, it actually is starting to sound uberly depressing!!!! So I shall stop now because I do not like that to be depressing, its just a point as to where I have to decided which direction I take the next step in my life.
I shall be gone.
Ciao!!!

Fourth of July

So last night was the fourth, it was really good to spend it in Idaho. I had plans of flying back to Hawaii yesterday but do to some bad text messages I lost confidence in the fact that I would of had a ride home and then a chance to go hang out with everyone. So I pushed my ticket back till July 9th.
So last night we did a small bbq here at the house and then at dark headed out to mom and dads place to watch fire works. It works out so great, they have a huge lawn that you lay down on and there were big fireworks all around. The Blackfoot show was short an didn't seem t have the nicest fireworks. The neighbors had nice ones to watch and they were great! So I didn't feel as bad for not flying out to Hawaii that early.
Well, this is my real first post here and I am thinking about posting a few pictures from HI and giving some details about them. Since I am no longer going to blog on MySpace, I decided to do the picture thing because I can put more info on with my pictures.
Well this is all for now. I sure am getting lazy on the blog thing, oh well.
Ciao!
Ok, heres a sweet pic I like:

this was one night, we got done swimming in the ocean and I actually called Brent and he invited us down to Waikiki, so since it was on the way home we headed down there. Well, everyone was going to hang out at the beach but I wanted ice cream. So me, Terry, and Jessica headed down the street for some ice cream. Coldstone is my favorite, and down in Waikiki they have the best macadamia nut flavored ice cream!!! Yeah, so I get that and add oreo , brownie, fudge, grahm cracker crumbs and of course, macadamia nuts to it. This one that the photo was taken in is the best by far. There is always a certain worker who helps me and he does a really nice job and it quick too. Trust me, you want the ones who are fast, there are long lines and people get very angry while setting in there waiting for their ice cream. I have come to know that I really don't like dealing with cheap Asians and mainlanders, none have the sense to be pleasant to deal with or be around.
ok, I am done!

My new blog

Aloha!
So since many of you know I love to blog and have not been blogging since I flew to Hawaii, I decided to set up a nicer blog than my previous one and MySpace blogs. I was thinking of transferring all of them blogs over. I don' think that I will be doing that, I think that I will start fresh from this point forward. Trust me I will get enough blogs going on here soon... in fact more that you will end up reading them daily. Just kidding, thats so not true! once school starts it will be true, but for summer time I will not do much blogging.
Ciao
Chris